An unusually explicit Magic: The Gathering card has been toned down to preserve the multiverse’s modesty. Danilo Laynes’ take on Stonecoil Serpent from the Ssssssnakessssss Secret Lair drop has all sorts of stuff stuck to its spines – and in the original version that included a tiny naked man, impaled on a spike, giving the horns hand gesture.
The naughty drawing, so small it could almost be called an easter egg, caused much guffawing from Magic fans, and zoomed-in versions were soon circulating online. Now it seems it’s been cleaned up. The official Secret Lair Twitter account has released new artwork without the little dude, with a statement saying the image “had an error that is not reflective of the final product”.
We enjoy this wording because it suggests the drawing could have somehow been done by accident. The new image with the spike conspicuously empty is also mighty funny in context. It would’ve been even better if Wizards had commissioned a replacement item, perhaps a kebab or a marshmallow or something, to go in the same spot.
Sadly, for anyone hoping to get their hands on a new rare MTG card – a Stonecoil Serpent with dong – MTG Secret Lairs are typically printed to demand, and released months after they’re preordered. The January 2023 Secret Lair superdrop, which this card is part of, is no different, and that means it’s rather unlikely that any uncensored serpents will be circulating, with the ‘error’ likely spotted long before printing. Hopefully the lil guy wasn’t the reason you pressed purchase.
One interesting side effect of this little episode is it has led to a great penis hunt in online Magic communities, with fans scouring old card art for a trace of anything phallic.
If you want Magic cards that are a little more risqué, for now it seems you’re going to have to rely on MTG proxies. Here’s some NSFW stuff – someone invented strip Magic: The Gathering!